Sunday, March 27, 2005
10:14 PM
oh yeah~ amen to that...it's great to worship a Saviour who i KNOW is ALIVE~! No worshipping dead ppl here :)
anyways...it's been a real kiddy day today...was involved in the easter celebrations in the sunday school..2 of my BB Boys came to church and 1 of them is gg to come every sunday~! yay~! haha..hope there'll be more to come!
yeah...as u can imagine, having all e kids cram into the seminar room, it's just amazing how many kids you can squeeze into the room...they're so darn adorable..haha..e things kid say..just brings a smile to your face and makes all the work worth it...
so..after church...went to play field soccer with Jason's uncle gang...sigh...as i said..it's really been a kiddy day...we actually played with KIDS~! think they're sec 1 at most...guess they're not bad for their age..but it just felt like we were bullying them...but as it ended, i think we lost to them (even though i didn't bother to keep score!) it was a pretty lousy show of soccer today...so many miscontrols and mistakes from everyone that it's better off not thinkg about it.
but anyhow....there's field soccer next week with the BBPC/ORPC gang! at marina somemore...nice place to play soccer...can fly kite if no one passes to me on the pitch! hope to see more YFers come down and make it like an excursion..haha...
oh yeah..and one last thought..sometimes, when you haven't seen someone for a long time, the sight of the person can actually take your breath away! :)
Friday, March 25, 2005
10:54 PM
What greater hurt is there,
than to see your very own child perish?
As our Saviour hung on the cruel tree,
Our Father's heart was pierced.
When the Lamb of God gave up his spirit,
His murderers asked,
"What have we done?"
A Portrait of Grace,
He died for YOU and ME.
Each time we forget the Son of Man's sacrifice,
Every instance we show our ingratitude
We pierce our Father's heart again.
"What have we done?"
Thursday, March 24, 2005
11:57 PM
Forsaken
by those He loved
Ridiculed
He kept His Silence
Abused
The gentle Lamb
Sacrificed
that we may live
爱
Wednesday, March 23, 2005
11:55 PM
finally~! my corporate reporting project is over~! the source of nearly all my stress and frustrations for the past 2 weeks~! woohoo~! it's like a thorn taken out of my flesh~!
yeah...had my presentations part today...was freaking stressed out by the thought of the professor questioning our every point and assumptions. Thank God that he showed mercy on us and let the class do the dirty work of questioning our itty-nitty details...haha...but whatever, it's over~! so i'm glad :)
Well, as with nearly every experience in life, it is God planned and purposed for my own good.
I've learnt a few things about myself:
1) i cannot take stress - when i'm too stressed, i would either rage out, or just fall into a state of total denial.
2) i like to bitch - just cldn't help bitching abt my project mates. What ungracious and ungodly behavior =(
No excuses for failing once again, as there should never be. But i've prayed forgiveness and by His grace, i hope to glorify God the next time such a situation comes again. So please wake me up when i am stressed please~! =D hmm...planned to write somemore..but it's late...so...zzzzzz
Tuesday, March 22, 2005
11:04 PM
signed up for the petition at www.facts.com.sg today.
Which means i am AGAINST the approval of casinos in Singapore.
Saw alot of signatories on the website too. but i just wonder, how many people are actually opposing the launch of casinos just because they think it doesn't seem right? Do most of the people even bother that much? Or are they just going with the herd mentality and just following what they've been led to believe?
As it happens, i've some thoughts on this casino issue, not so much because i'm much of a political thinker, but just that I happened to be present at various scenarios where this topic was discussed.
Anyways, I was at LKY's talk at NUS about a month or so ago. You might probably remember it for a certain history undergraduate who had a few choice words for our MM(he doesn't melt anywhere....ok not funny). It was rather a pity that the whole event was overshadowed by a history undergraduate who should be applauded for his courage in venting his exams stress on probably the most powerful political figure in Singapore. (personally i prefer to just go for a jog)
While his talk on "how much of our past experience is relevant for our future" was perhaps just another excuse for his "back in the pre-independence days" stories, it was perhaps his answers during the Q&A sessions that really meant more to me.
Apart from that brave soul, there were others who questioned our MM. In particular, i remember the first guy cos he sounded so eloquent and his tone was so measured and sounded so refined while asking his 5 min question. By 5 min question, i mean that's how long it took for him to ask his question.
To sum up his question, it was something about how come Singaporeans do not have their own identity and how we've grown to not have a sense of belonging.
I'm sure at some point in time this topic has come out and you've probably just nodded your head in agreement and started bemoaning what wretched souls we are to not have a home for our own.
I must admit, that prior to that talk, that's pretty how much i felt.
MM's response was what shook me up. In fact, his answers to every other question after that were very simple.
No. 1, where did you get that information?
No. 2, if you really feel so strong about it, do something about it.
Going back to the Mr 5 minute man, the first question revealed the source of his enlightment: our esteemed Mr Taxi Driver man. Yup, that's right.
Naturally, the whole auditorium erupted in laughter, and from then on, he was in shambles. Turned out later that this fella was actually interested to join PAP. hmmmm.....
But mockery aside, MM's response was certainly hard hitting. Yet, it was so basic and fundamental. And his challenge to you to do something about it. Well, how can you fight argue against a man who has done nothing but fight for this nation all his life? Leading by example is the most powerful way to lead just because of this factor: you are untouchable.
Still, what is the moral of this whole story? Well, for one, Singaporeans seem to be rather NATO (no action, talk only).
Of course, i am a fool to comment on all this as i am showing the NATO characteristic that i'm speaking out against. but i justify myself: I do not mean to say that action speaks louder than words and we should all form political parties. But rather, i just feel that whenever we decry any government decision, let it be an informed one and not just part of a chorus of noise.
MM Lee himself said that the government does not intend to be swayed by a minority group of people who make alot of noise.
When you come to think of it, you cannot deny that a government's role is to take into account the welfare of the general population and not submit to the noisy minority.
Contrasting this stand against the certain political systems in other countries where governments are not as strong-willed as ours, this argument would seem very much validated.
Back to the casino argument, i'm sure that the government has mapped out all the benefits and costs of having a casino, if not for considering the net benefits on our society, then perhaps to prepare their defence.
And their arguments are pretty sound; people are already doing it, it is already culture. the money is flowing about already, so why not capture it?
It absolutely cannot be denied that gambling is all part of asian tradition. Just think of Chinese New Year where gambling is part and parcel of the celebrations. It came as quite a shock to me that some of my friends who had otherwise been proclaiming such high moral standards throughout the year could just shrug off their fling during the festivities as just being "once a year what" or "it's tradition".
4-D, Toto, and soccer betting is rampant around us everywhere we turn. Indeed, there is much money floating about.
Basing on all this factors, i see no reason why a casino should not be built. Indeed, it sounds like a perfectly logical reason and could even cure some gamblers of their habit as the government would be able to regulate the industry from now on.(sounds like wishful thinking tho)
However, i still signed that petition. Why? Simple reason:
i believe that, by allowing the casino move to go through, the government is signalling the approval of gambling as an acceptable lifestyle habit. While gambling is marginally accepted as a neccessary evil now, allowing the casino would be a big step in the WRONG direction.
I agree especially with the notion that we should think of our future generations. While it can be argued that adults should be allowed the free will to do what they feel is right, we reflect the more important potential victims of this move: our children.
So, rather than being a noisy minority, let us be a responsible majority and make our claim loudly heard by our leaders.
Yup, that's my horribly long-winded answer. Never said i would entertain. =P
Sunday, March 20, 2005
10:12 PM
was supposed to send this blog out yday...but anyways...
yup...what is one thing that you can lose easily but never get it back again?
your temper.
yup, that's what i did...lost my temper at a project mate yday...it's been a real tough week rushing my projects, stress, lack of sleep, suppressed feelings of anxiety and frustration. All these would be my excuse for flaring up at my friend...
but in the end, when i really think abt it, there was only one reason why things ended the way they did:
Pastor Seah had said this before: Stress is when YOU are in control.
So, that basically sums up e scenario...i didn't lift everything into God's hands. However much i believed in my own stand and however strong my rationale and logic was in the argument, there was no reason for me to behave in such an ungodly manner.
Looking back, it wasn't much of an issue in the first place. The problem was that i didn't communicate the facts properly. Guess that i was just using the argument as an avenue to vent the frustrations i had accumulated with him over the past few days of rushing the project with him.
Today (sunday), i shared this with my bible study group and Uncle David Yeong even prayed for me...really feel so blessed and joyous that God has blessed me with a wonderful spiritual family in church and just wanna praise God for his forgiveness and grace~! Hallelujah~!
yeah...really love my bible study group...i gain so much from this lil' grp of mine..haha..virtually like cell grp...e main point that spoke to me today was this point that it is healthy for a Christian to be constantly in spiritual warfare. Cos if you are always experiencing peace of mind and spirit, then you are either,
defeated, or
a deserter.
Nono...i don't ever want to be either...i shall fight the good fight and depend on Him for strength~! NO MORE SELF-CENTREDNESS~!
Friday, March 18, 2005
10:09 PM
Corporate Reporting and Financial Analysis or corp reporting for short (hence corpse reporting gettit? oh nevermind.)
this dumb project has been sticking in my head for the past 2 weeks....it's supposed to be one of the toughest modules in SMU and, boy, they weren't kidding.
Have you ever turned past your favourite obituary section in the Straits Times and looked at all the financial mumbo jumbo? well, this is a LOT WORSE~! I actually got to slog through nearly 200 pages of nitty gritty accounting terms for just 1 company~! and my project involved 3 companies!
Goodness....anyways...can't really blame anyone except ourselves...my project group jus kept procastinating our way through...it's unbelieveable that we've only ever had 1 real project meeting~! and even then, it lasted barely 1-2hours...and it wasn't a meeting! we just gathered to do our individual parts~! Really can't believe that i could be involved in such a scenario in Year 3~! sheesh...guess i just don't learn...
Anyways, basically for the whole of this past week, i've slept, ate, drank, sh***ed nothing but that project. So, yeah, i'm not gonna touch it in a long while~!
SIGH...sch tmr again...have a make-up class (not cosmetics kind, the replacement kind), and another project meeting, and other project deadlines to meet. whoopee. virtually living a life of a rock star. yeah right.
Dunno why everytime i feel stressed, i wanna watch a movie~! and not just any old stupid movie (no jack neo movies for me please), must be a good movie! So what is a good movie to me? no.1 criteria is: it must be unique/special~ yup i lurve whimsical moveis, Romeo + Juliet, Love me if you dare, My Girl (a thai show), Moulin Rouge, Finding Neverland, and just uber-cool movies, Matrix 1, City of God. no.2 criteria is: it must have a good storyline: something that will enlighten you, e.g. 6th Sense, Matrix triology,etc. and no.3 criteria is it must be darn cute and farney~!, Finding Nemo, The Incredibles, Shrek 2.
Of course, just meeting either of the criteria wld be enough...sheesh..can't imagine a cutesy cartoonish Romeo dodging bullets while spouting philosophical stuff ya? hmmmm....
Ah well, anyone for a movie? and anyone knows of a decent movie nowadays in the 1st place?
Tuesday, March 15, 2005
11:12 PM
yeah man...happy 24th bday to ya...2nd cycle of the year of rooster for u man...sigh....TWENTY-FOUR years old...that's how old i am this year too. That's like MID-TWENTIES...sheesh..it's true what they say..once you hit 20, time just accelerates...guess it's because of the extra workload and responsibilities that keep you occupied and less conscious of the passing time.
Anyways, had dinner with JUNLIANG, CHAOQUN, BEN, JASON, WEIWEN, KATHERINE & SHIMIN. if you are wondering why the name are in caps, it's because i want to show that they are important enough to be in my blog..haha~
Was pretty nice being able to just relax with old friends (8 years of friendship~!) and take a break from all the work...hmm...most of them are going to graduate this year, the gals have already started working..think future gatherings are gonna be a bit weird. Them in their business wear, and jason and i in our berms and slippers still.. :P
Hey~! must remember to bug junliang to start a blog...he has the most interesting and action-packed stories...sure gonna beat talkingcock.com in terms of controversy man... :P
guess i have nothing interesting to write today...just recording down what i've done today...Zzzz stuff man...mabbe when i'm done with my work...then i can get some not so boring thots out :\
Monday, March 14, 2005
12:00 AM
yup...went for sports fellowship today...NO SOCCER~! ARGH~! cos apparently the worship team (meaning most of the soccer gang) were practising till very late. ended up playing NETBALL...argh...never thot it'd come to this...sheesh...haha..but actually not too bad lah..quite fun playg with kids :P
went to the pasar malam next to Jurong MRT with my bro, kate and swi....usual stuff there...not much interesting..didn't get anything for myself. But those 3 sugar-holics with me ah~! Eating ice-cream AND candy floss at the same time..sheesh..YUCKS...so much sugar~! how can u guys stand it? Salt and oily stuff..hmmm...that's another thing..haha..u FREAKS~! haha
as usual, there's the chinese auction person telling their stories, showing their salesmanship, trying to sell stuff that ppl wld otherwise never buy~! i mean jade horses? mini-waterfalls? wooden sculptures? how much more tacky can u get?
anyways...it's gonna be a tough week ahead..gotta be on top of my game for the coming week. Really thank God for a good rest so far, but it's time to race! After i finish watching No Way Out now, that is..haha
Sunday, March 13, 2005
11:47 PM
or rather...dealing with Vengeance.
the topic for the sermon today (as given by Pastor Graham, not me~!)
Passage for sermon:
You have heard that it was said,'Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.' But i tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If somone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. Give to the one who asks you, but do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you.
You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbour and hate your enemy.' But i tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? DO not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore as your hevenly Father is perfect
-Matthew 5:38-48
I "Eye for Eye" v 38-42
The "eye for eye" subject is genuinely written in the scriptures. Does this mean that Jesus is blasphemising? To judge that, we should take a look at the verse in question:
"If men who are fighting hit a pregnant woman and she gives birth prematurely but there is not serious injury, the offender must be fined whatever the the woman's husband demands and the court allows. But if there is serious injury, you are to take life for life, eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot, burn for burn, wound for wound, bruise for bruise.
Exodus 21-22-23
Looking at this, we see a big discrepency from what we've assumed the "eye for eye" principle to mean~! In actual fact, the principle:
1) only applied under the special circumstances: "If men who are fighting hit a pregnant woman and she gives birth prematurely"
2) was supposed to limit the claims of the husband. e.g. if the baby loses one eye, he cannot demand that the man give both his eyes
3) perhaps most importantly, this verse was meant as a guideline for JUDGES, and not supposed to empower individuals to deal out their own brand of mercy.
Jesus was actually speaking against the Pharisees who had twisted the meaning of this verse to suit their own purposes and to mislead the people. Instead of reacting, Jesus says we should not retaliate or resist.
II Love your enemy v43-48
Just as God is good to all, we are to be good to ALL, not only our friends. Paul had mentioned:
So i say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature
Galatians 5:16
This is a mark of Son-ship. "Scratching backs" is "normal (v47), but to be perfect like God (v48) is divine. Still, it is not possible by our own strength to do this as we are, by nature, imperfect. In his letter to the Galatians, Paul had said:
I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life i live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.
Galatians 2:20
That's why we have to depend on Him for strength to do so.
Applications
- Be different because you, a child of God, are different
- Do not retaliate. Leave judgment and vengeance to God --> Romans 12:14-21
- Follows Jesus's example for righteous suffering - He could have summoned legions of angels to protect Him from the pharisees but He did not. He recognised God had a plan for him and Jesus obeyed totally. 1 Peter 2: 19-24
Saturday, March 12, 2005
4:24 PM
wow...really gotta praise the Lord today~! Was feeling kinda stressed yday cos of my various projects....but after BB today...wow~~ felt so de-stressed....those Boys were just so darn farney lah..haha...their innocence and their mischievousness just perked me up and reminded me of the wonderful creations of God. Such optimism and joyfulness in those wonderful children. Yup. Just have to lift this up to Him before i begin my work again. yeah..i'm stuck in sch doing projects again...but at least i'm happy~! :D
Friday, March 11, 2005
9:54 PM
wow...did a really cool interview with the managing director of Barang Barang, the furniture place at Great World City. The guy is insanely business-minded lah...Basically interviewed him cos he's an entrepreneur and i'm taking this entrepreneurship module. Gosh...really learnt alot from him regarding how to view and strategise for business. In fact, i think i acquire more knowledge in that 1-hour session than one whole term of e dumb entrepreneurship module.
Anyways, just to share, one of the things he mentioned that really struck me was how he said, "Sports is very important".
Of course, on top of the keeping the body fit and mind sharp aspect of sports, he talked about how sports can actually build character. Cos, in order to be the best, u gotta compete against the rest. Sports is probably the platform where u can actually compete respectfully and ethically. (ok, assuming no one takes drugs or bribes yah? No argument is totally sound~!) Yup, so in sports, most times, it is down to sheer hard work and passion that will see you better the other person.
Speaking of which, i managed to get a game of street footy near my house just now~! Really needed it man...felt the stress throughout the day today. Played with a bunch of malays..sheesh...they were brilliant...and only 15-18 years old. They were like doing some nike advert while playing..Yes, they were THAT good. Seems that they were from the ex-Jurong FC youth team. No wonder.
Which brings me to my point that sometimes effort just ain't enough. Think thierry henry..some ppl are just extra-blessed by God in their own way. Sometimes, you just gotta take a step back, admire their talent, and just take comfort that you've done your best and have no regrets.
SIGH. Tomorrow's gonna be a hectic day...BB in the morning followed by 1 whole day in school doing project. Actually looked forward to playing field soccer with the church team but seems like it's not on anymore...ah well...c'est la vie..
Thursday, March 10, 2005
9:39 PM
finally done with one of my presentations today...one down, 3 more to go...yes, that's SMU for you..lots of presentation...but guess that's one of the main reasons why i chose to go to SMU in the first place. Knowing myself, being introverted, not eloquent, and not very skilfull social-wise, i guess i just had to place myself in a position where i will be forced to change. haha..come to think of it...that's e reason for many of the decisions i make nowadays...kinda like fighting a social war within myself...hiaks~
anyways...tmr is gonna be another project day..gotta do down and interview this managing director guy of Barang Barang..the furniture place...just can't seem to find any information or background about him. Die...hate to be unprepared..have to depend on my project mate. She's cool. haha
Feelin' kinda down from an incident yday. Seems that the replacement teacher-in-charge for the BB in Princess Elizabeth Pri is quite off. I just requested that he release consent forms for the Boys to come to church next sunday for their donation drive as well as permission for BBPC's Puppet Ministry to set up a show for the Boys in the pri sch. And his reply? "the students will not be able to go for both." no explanation, nothing. sheesh. Obviously i pressed him for at least some reason why so that i can state my case, and his answer was just "This is the school's decision." Informed the Head of Department for CCA (his son is in BB in the sch) and he was quite puzzled about it. ah well...shall lift it to the hands of God. I'm sure He has plans for the Boys. =)
Stress stress stress. Wanted to go for a run today...but by e time i came back, it was so late...oh well..better find some other way of relaxing..like blogging..haha...
I know what i wanna do after all my projects are over man...gonna go East Coast Park...went there 2 years ago when i was damn stressed..wow...really worked wonders man...wanna go there and cycle to the jetty and stare out at the sea and enjoy the wonderful sun and the breeze and soak in the sounds of the waves crashing against the jetty. ahh....BLISS
back to reality now. Important projects due the next few weeks. Test to be completed by tmr. BB parade on saturday. Please continue to pray for me~! :D
Wednesday, March 09, 2005
9:24 PM
sigh....the time of the term again...projects keep swarming in...comin to sch in the morn, leaving sch when the moon is bright and shining...9.30pm and still working on my project here...sheesh...that's SMU life for ya...oh well...guess i can't complain too much...been procastinating as usual, getting distracted by stupid stuff too...it's really a vicious cycle, thus proving the saying true: "those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it".
Human nature sucks man. BIG TIME. Leave a person alone and without accountability for a while and chances are, he/she wld end up forsaking his/her responsibilities. Like wat my pastor says, (yeah i like to quote, so? sue me. :D) " People don't do what is expected, but what is inspected"
Ok, so i'm probably just generalising...or mabbe it's just me...ah well..time to get movin' anyhows...looks like this weekend is burnt for me....again.
Anyways, i think i'm really a person who doesn't feel stress. I don't mean i'm NOT stressed. I am, just that i won't know it. THAT is bad. Its small wonder why people often would just come up to me and say, " hey, you're very stressed ah" Apparently, i have this "stressed face" that they see. I absolutely don't notice it man. Thank God for friends. hehe...
I don't know about you, but when i'm stressed i tend to do even more stupid stuff than usual. Also lose control without realising it. Last night, i was in school till 10.30pm rushing a project too. Throughout the night, i was just sniping and being just mean to this guy friend of mine. Mind you, he really seems to be asking for it. Really got me quite fed up and i just did whatever came naturally to me. Teased him alot and felt it was fun..at least for me.
Well, i guess that, between guys, this kinda small jibing shouldn't be too much of a problem but then i just felt something wasn't very nice about it. After a long while ( i am slow), i finally figured that i wasn't behaving as a christian should. I was just being mean because it felt good. But that's totally not what Jesus said;
Matthew 12:34-35, "...for out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him."
So much for following your heart and stuff eh? As the times grow tougher, i got to depend more on him...shall not repeat my many mistakes in depending on my own strength. Pray for me please!
p.s. shall not continue on the superhero thingy...cos abit too pretentious and quite frankly, not very interesting anymore :\
Monday, March 07, 2005
10:16 PM
ahh....the start of a new week...and what better way to start it then to have a 3-hr lesson that starts at 8.45am where i get to see one of the wonders of my SMU education - the impromptu lesson stand-up comic otherwise known as my professor.
First thing he did when he came to class was to tell us he has postponed the test because, according to him, he has 3 sessions of the same class so he hasn't figured how to grade all of us equally. Thus, we shall all seat for the same paper on thursday at 7PM-9PM. yippee~! i jus love to stay back in sch to make up for the laziness of the professor who is paid by my parent's money~! =D
Aiyah....actually it doesn't really bug me that much...jus wanna let off some steam..haha...this is a category 2) blog~! (refer to a prev entry)
Anyways...lately i've been reading alot of comic books, courtesy of the well-stocked teens section in Jurong library. (yah yah..wat m i doing there right? wat-EVER~! haha..how juvenile)
My current fave comic is JLA (Justice League of America) which is basically a grp of superhumans (i.e. The Flash, Green Lantern (my fave~! :) ), Superman, Batman,Wonder Woman, Martian Manhunter, Plastic Man). In short, it is a ridiculously stupid comic but it just looks so cool. But anyways...after gg thru so many of these comic books, really makes me wonder: wat if there WERE such super-powered beings flying ard, laying the law down?
I'm sure at some point of time in life, we'd be lookg at natural disasters or other tragedies and wished that there was a superman to have saved those poor souls or something. But does society really need them? do we really nd self-proclaimed gods who can be likened to nuclear missiles except that they are fallible to human emotions. Wld the world be a safer place with them ard? haha...guess my ans to that has to be continued...gotta work now... :P
Sunday, March 06, 2005
8:28 PM
yup...it's been a really rainy day...but still managed to get in a game of footy with my n'hood frenz...haha...which also means soccer at breakneck speed..or in my case break-knee speed...sheesh...i gotta find frenz who r willing to play less competitively man.. :/
Well, it's a SUNDAY~! Was assigned to lead worship for e sunday school kids...gosh...didn't expect so many of them...and since they were all so tiny, abt 50-60 of them squeezed into the little old YF room~! more cuteness per square-inch in the whole of the church at least~! haha...yeah..they were adorable...but leading singspiration ain't my cup of tea so just went thru e phases and sang e typical songs..ah well...
okie..as usual..back to mugging..have test tmr~! *ouch* my knee hurts... :(
Saturday, March 05, 2005
10:13 PM
yupz...today is the 21st bday of Mr Jonathan Fung...went to his place for e bday party...haha...it's been so long since i've actually bothered to go to a bday party so jon...if u r reading this...i give u alot of face ok? sigh....practically slogged on my projects from the moment i woke up until i went for e party...forsee that i'll be spending e whole of tmr doing e same thing...no soccer and sports fellowship for e 2nd consecutive week i guess :( okie..no extra thots today cos it's all filled with Jetblue, Delta, American and Southwest ( my project stuff lah )... back to work~!
Friday, March 04, 2005
10:06 PM
hmm...expecting me to pour out my soul about something that happened today? well..sorry but i was just tryg to be attn seeking with that title...which brings me to some thots i have abt blogging... seems to me that when ppl blog, they tend to release all their inhibitions. The result is that you see either 1) super mournful, woe is me kinda stuff 2) people bitching abt each and every single thing that happened to them 3) super pretentious ppl who seem to be blogging with an open dictionary or thesaurus and come up with the cheem cheem stuff.
I guess i've been pretty apprehensive abt starting a blog cos i'm really afraid of falling under category 3). Why is that? Cos 1 of my greatest fears is to become like a Pharisee...i.e. hypocritical ppl who like to show off. *yucks*
So then, m i being hypocritical by starting a blog? haha..dun really noe at this point. Right now, wat i really wanna do is just capture my thots so jus in case i die a sudden violent death, at least there'll be some material to do some research for my obituary..hahaha...so morbid eh :P
ok...enough of my thots...abt my happenins' today...well..another day in sch...projects projects projects...sigh...really gotta push myself to finish all of them~! altho i must say i still got alot of time since i dun have any more quizzes..but still..it's a team effort so gotta rush for it. On another note, "A" level results were released today~! haha...seems kinda weird but Jiet got e same results as me and swi.. CCB (not a vulgarity, that's the 3 letter grades we got, haha) Feeling v happy my lil' sis cos i know she's been thru so much...even broke down i heard (poor gal :( ) still...she's been strong and put everything into His loving hands...PTL for His grace~! haha...oh well...after 2 restless nights in that lousy hotel room, i better have an early night~ *poof*
Thursday, March 03, 2005
5:48 PM
Dear blog, i have to confess something. Last night, i spent the night at Hotel 81 Gold in Geylang, right smack in the middle of the "hot spot" of the red light district. I couldn't help it. It was beyond my control. As much as i regretted my decision that led me to those circumstances, i had to do it. haha....okok...b4 ur thots run wild, i've got to clarify. Yes, i did spend the night in the hotel. BUT it was just to fulfill a promise to a friend that i would help them with their project. What sort of project? once again, keep ur thots clean~! well, i'm supposed to stay over at the hotel and complete a comprehensive survey on the service level and the comfort level of the hotel.
As exotic as a stay in a hotel in that location may seem, it was a quiet, uneventful night. (i.e. i didn't hear any sex noises from other rooms~!) Still, i gotta say that it was quite scary to walk down that area late at night. I guess it was just the unfamiliarity and the perceptions of the place that really freaked me out. It was all so real...u cld just see guys negotiating, scouting and all. Quite interesting but yet rather saddening too when u think abt it. Cos these are probably the kinda ppl the our Lord Jesus came down and mingled upon and saved. I just cldn't help but wonder: how many of these souls will have even a chance.
I mean, one of the main arguments that non-christians put across is: If God loves ALL of us, then how come SO MANY people do not get a chance to be saved? Honestly speaking, i do not really have a concrete answer against that. I mean, i can say that God is almighty and His ways are mysterious and incomprehensible to our human mind and who are we to question what He does. Although this answer is probably logically true, it somehow leaves one unsatisfied. hmmm....shall ponder over this...right now, it's time to start on myu project~!
Finally~! A blog of my own....don't really know why i just had the urge to start a blog...need for attention perhaps? hmmm...anyways...for all intents, hope to understand my own thoughts through this blog....hopefully someday i'll be able to look back at e thoughts i'm having now and have a gd laugh at what an idiot i was...at least it shows i would have learnt something in between then..hope ya all can give comments (haha..reminds me of the singapore idol "careless whisper" guy) so that i can speed that process up ya?....haha...cheers~!